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Posted 2014-08-25T04:49:10+02:00
Couples who sit side by side in a booth, but not because they are in love but because they are sick of each other faces

Funny(3)
Posted 2014-08-25T04:31:09+02:00
I don't trust Penguins. I know you can fly you sneaky fucks!

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

VV Try buying a few vowels and consonants and learn to spell for next time and you will not look as inbred as you do now. Dropping out after 3rd grade was not your best move.

Comment by Anonymous

that dickwad is mad huh?

Comment by Anonymous

v U don't understand a fucking joke u fucking stinky twat. U shud nvr post here, u cunt.

Comment by Anonymous

You're an idiot. Do us a favor and NEVER post on here again.

Posted 2014-08-25T03:27:07+02:00
Marrying another man is less gay than riding on a Vespa with him.

Funny(3)
Posted 2014-08-25T03:18:18+02:00
You had me at 0 mutual friends.

Funny(4)
Posted 2014-08-25T03:18:07+02:00
The most common crossfit injury is a black eye from talking about it too much.

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

That's also an ailment suffered by those on gluten-free diets.

Posted 2014-08-25T03:12:21+02:00
Fear the man wearing velcro strapped sandals, for he has nothing left to lose.

Funny(4)
Posted 2014-08-25T03:02:32+02:00
How easily you're offended is directly proportional to how dumb you are.

Epic(1)
Posted 2014-08-25T02:33:50+02:00
I could actually watch golf on TV if Land Mines were involved.

Funny(3)
Posted 2014-08-25T02:31:22+02:00
Knock Knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

Funny(2)
Comment by Anonymous

VV How could you prove a negative?

Comment by Anonymous

excuseme idiot and what about Thor?

Comment by Anonymous

god doesn't exist.

Posted 2014-08-25T02:28:11+02:00
If you take bites out of string cheese rather than rip strings off , you don't fucking deserve string cheese.

Get a Life(2)
Comment by Anonymous

i stole this one like 2 years ago

Comment by Anonymous

V I bet you're one of the dumb fucks that don't deserve string cheese. It's called string cheese for a reason. If you're gonna bite out of it, rather than peel the strings off, then what's the point of eating string cheese? The only cheese you should be allowed to get is a block of cheese, you fucking blockhead.

Comment by Anonymous

Same idiot as the penguin status. Keep your dumb posts to your dumb self

Posted 2014-08-25T02:19:26+02:00
My mom just learned how to text. And her text to me said "can you hear me?"

Funny(1)
Comment by Anonymous

V hahahaha!! I'm sure it will be disturbing as always.

Comment by Anonymous

Really? Wow you are making it easy for the status douche to make his mom comment.

Posted 2014-08-25T02:16:22+02:00
I'm a bad motherfucker until I see a puppy.

Funny(1)
Posted 2014-08-25T02:15:44+02:00
Blow me like a welfare check.

Epic(3)
Posted 2014-08-25T02:01:43+02:00
When it comes to fucking around, I don't fuck around.

Funny(1)
Posted 2014-08-25T00:40:34+02:00
Relationship status: sleeping in my bed diagonally

Funny(3)
Posted 2014-08-25T00:35:30+02:00
If a man says you're ugly he's being mean. If a woman says you're ugly she's envious. If a little kid says you're ugly, you're ugly.

Funny(4)
Posted 2014-08-25T00:32:18+02:00
Good things come to those who wait. Better things come if you stop fucking around and make shit happen.

Funny(2)
Posted 2014-08-25T00:23:50+02:00
In grade school it's called bullying but when you get older it's referred to as upper level management.

Funny(3)
Posted 2014-08-25T00:06:58+02:00
Creepy: People who request middle seats on airplanes.

Epic(1)
Posted 2014-08-24T05:46:33+02:00
You'd think that with as much time as women spend looking at their ass in the mirror they would be able to reverse into a parking spot.

Epic(3)
Comment by Anonymous

Now you don't have to be the only one here with a same sex partner.

Comment by Anonymous

And the lesbian has arrived

Comment by Anonymous

But they keep being lied to about what 8 inches looks like.


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